Rudy's Cum Comes Home to Roost

There are a lot of reasons I have never liked Rudy Giuliani. It's not so much that I disagree with him on several political issues. After all, I have slept with a Trotskyite. My real beef is that Rudy is such an arrogant asshole.

I venture into New York City two or three times a year. After Giuliani took over, I appreciated the disappearance of the squeegy thugs who extorted drivers by running out at stop lights, and doing a piss poor job of “washing” the windshield. And while he was at the helm, the city did spruce up, though this was largely due to an upturn in the economy, and the hiring of additional police officers, as authorized by Rudy's predecessors.

But Rudy was a loveable asshole, in an Archie Bunker kind of way. And First Amendment stuff aside, those sex shops in Times Square were pretty disgusting.

However, the day the mayor called a press conference to inform his wife he was having a hot affair, and would be filing for divorce, that was it.

I am not too keen on cheaters to start with, but calling a press conference to soften the blow is a first in the history of jerkhood. I guess Mrs. Giuliani was kind of surprised to be informed in this manner, but it did not come as a shock , since Rudy had been having an affair with a different woman a few months earlier.

The mayor did go on to divorce his wife and marry the new squeeze.

By the way, she is the one whom President Giuliani intends to have sit in on cabinet meetings.

And, the new wife does keep her wandering husband on a tight leash:



However, I now find out the taxpayers of New York were helping Rudy slide his penis into this unfortunate woman.

Some reporters started looking into this in 2001 when a city auditor found $34,000 of travel expenses hidden in accounts of the New York City Loft Board . Rudy refused to comment for “security” reasons.

But some skeptics got to wondering what security issue could be plaguing the city's loft apartments. So they dug deeper.

And, now through the Freedom of Information Act, it has been revealed the American Express bills were used to finance trips out to Southampton, the Long Island town where his lady friend had an apartment.

The mayor has managed to combine four of the worst traits of modern Republicans: immoral behavior, hypocrisy, fiscal irresponsibility, and misuse of the “security” tag.

Last night, on the debates, some YouTube twit asked him about this, and with a straight face Giuliani tried to brush off concerns about "things that happened 5, 6 years ago."

But Rudy, your whole campaign is based on something that happened six years ago.