Saints & Sinners on the Jersey Shore

One way old moribund industrial towns in the rust belt, and Northeast, attempt to gain new life is to encourage the development of upscale watering holes. It works quite well. The old rotting warehouses are converted into chic clubs. Then boutiques and sandwich shops move in. Before long overpriced artist flats and hip urban condos are constructed.

But inevitably the deep rooted American guilt complex begins to nag, and some start to question how the Lord will look upon a community that is revitalized on the back of sin. Then everything gets all divisive, and the city fathers (and mothers) find themselves in a pitched battle with God's appointed spokespersons for the soul of the community.

It's all really stupid—but if you think it can be resolved without going to federal court you must be new to this country.

One of the loopholes in our secular constitution is the state's ability to monitor and impose morality thorough the regulation of alcohol. After prohibition was repealed, the states were, rightly, permitted to regulate booze in any way they wished. Some localities went, and still are, dry. Almost all had silly blue laws that did such things as prohibit the sale of liquor on Sunday.

It was common to give Churches the right to veto liquor licenses in their proximity—or outright prohibit the sale of six packs within spitting distance of a church. In America it has generally been assumed that the Lord and Liquor do not mix (Catholic social events excepted).

In the decaying resort town of Long Branch, New Jersey the state mandated segregation of boozers and bible thumpers has resulted in the persecution of a church.

Long Branch zoned an entertainment district. The rules prohibited construction of a church in the area, since state law would then prohibit construction of dens of inequity—and defeat the whole intent. There would just be continued urban blight, broken up by a few churches and soup kitchens.

So when the Lighthouse Association of Evangelicals wanted to set up shop in Long Branch, they were told to pack their Bibles and keep on trucking.

But the god fearing do the same as everyone else does in America these days—they got a lawyer.

For seven years the case has been winding its way through the federal courts. The issues are the Free Exercise Clause of the First Amendment and a special law passed by the godly Republican Congress in 2000 called the Religious Land Use and Institutionalized Persons Act, which was designed to ensure that land use planners don't dezone God.

Last December the Third Circuit basically told Long Branch they were good to go—throw out the saints and get down.

The case is now sitting on the steps of the US Supreme Court.

Is this inane or what? In America we certainly should not be prohibiting Churches, but we should not give them the legal authority to dictate what other people wish to do on their private property.

If anyone had an ounce of sense in New Jersey, the statute giving the Upright veto power over liquor sales would just be repealed. We'd have the Lighthouse Church and Dance Clubs all doing their own thing. Everyone would be happy—except the lawyers.

But common sense never prevails when what is really needed is a long session on the couch to resolve the schizoid bipolar nature of the American Soul.

The Supreme Court will probably have no real choice but to accept review of the case, since the Circuits are split on the issue.

However, Supreme Court decisions are a poor substitute for therapy.